Yeah, pretty much. I really see no reason for it being a holiday. What are we celebrating? Being fat, obnoxious americans who are amazed my shiny lights in the sky? Because all people do is eat, get drunk, eat, watch fireworks, and eat. How ridiculous, right? So while everyones out doing all that, I'm going to stay home and be a bored internet junkie =/. There's like not really anyone online, so it's kinda dumb. So anyways, I need to take a "Forth of July" themed picture with my pink ball from SocialVibe. So I can have a chance to win a canon camera and photoshop, both of which I need desperately. So I need help thinking of something, any ideas? And wow, sorry 'bout my blogs getting shorter and shorter. It's just nothing exciting ever happens in my life anymore. Maybe someone will change that some day... Well, I'll be here waiting.
I've been crying a lot lately, and I never cry. It's just everything has been hitting hard lately, not the greatest thing to happen. I'm just really complicated, and everyone is starting to drift away from me. I'm losing all my friends, well this has been happening for a few years now. But I only have a few left now... So it's not that great. And family issues are lame, especially when you're the cause of them =/. I'm just trying to get through high school, and hopefully enjoy it. But then I'm out of here, off to SoCal. Not really sure what I'll do there, but my options will probably be better there. Life overall will be better there. Not really sure what I want to do, maybe I'll go to beauty school. Get certified to cut hair, yeah, that's what I probably will end up doing. I also want to do side projects or something. I want more than one "career", I know I want to do some modeling. And I also want to help people/the world somehow. So I plan doing this all in life. Because, really, you only live once, so might as well do what you want. Annnddddd, I think I want my septum pierced. Either that or lip piercing. Just saying, ha. Well writing this blog has helped a lot, so hopefully someone reads it, ha.
I'm feeling really bad for people I've never even met before. I'm really worried about them, Stacey and Matthew Lush that is. Matthew was ignoring Stacey all day yesterday, and she just wanted to know if he was going to Six Flags for his birthday. But she started crying from him ignoring her. I told her I was deeply sorry, because in Matt's chat, we all told him to call her because she was crying. But he just ignored everyone and got off cam. And I guess he deleted her from myspace, and all this drama. So I guess their not friends anymore, and she was going to get him a yorkie =[. I feel so bad for the both of them, I can't really pick a side, because both of them are amazing people. Hopefully they make up, because it doesn't seem as any of them are against each other... I hope things are better, because I can't help but to feel really bad =/.
Ok so, I went to Warped Tour in San Francisco today, and all though the weather was nice and cool, it was sort of disappointing. It could just be me though. When we saw Norma Jean, it just didn't seem so exciting, but it could be because they played sort of early. The Devil Wears Prada were great! But oh my god... I never knew Jeffree Star was so retarded. I mean, he seems okay on the internet, but in person, he just acts weird. He's too full of himself and too slutty. The person I wanted to see live the most was Katy Perry. But sadly, HER CROWD WAS STUPID!
But things are hitting me hard. =/ I'm just thinking of stuff, like "what if" stuff. And it's sort of going to the level where I'm about to break down and cry =[. I know of coarse boys don't cry =|. I just need to stop thinking about it, even if becomes reality. Which would be the worst thing to ever happen to me. Nothing in my life would be the same. My future would be crushed, and everything around me. So lets pray that it doesn't come true. And don't ask me what it is, I rather not say.
