It's been a while, almost a month.

I've been through some things that have made me unable to update. I've dealt with them, and one in particular I'm still dealing with. I'm doing some law stuff, very serious business.

Anyways, I just got home yesterday from staying a week with friends at their apartment in LA. Constant party, and what not. I honestly missed home, I missed getting things done, I was so off track and it was getting depressing.

But now, I'm back and everything's good. :D
Tomorrow is 4th of July, not really a fan of the whole celebrating the US because the government is so FUCKED. Although, I do love the fireworks and activities they have on that day. So, I'll probably be out and about and what not.

Have a new boy in my life, things are looking good. It's moving a lot slower than the last boy. I really needed a slower pace though. Hopefully things work out and everything is perfect. As of now I'm infatuated and happy. XD

This has to be one of the most over dramatic weeks of my life. I havent been out this weekend, and don't plan on being around many people for a while. I realized, I just need to find enlightenment in myself. People like to think they know me, it kind of made me lose myself.

As I start to regain everything in myself, I'l be posting more. Also, I'll be working harder as well. A lot of stuff has been keeping me from starting school. My family has been not acknowledging it or me for that matter. I'm going to start taking things in my own hands, finally!

I want to start anywhere as soon as possible, and also start an internship within the coming months. I'll be nineteen in August, I want to be well on my way by then.

OTHER NEWS, I'm obsessed with Natasha Khan of Bat For Lashes. Everything about her is inspiring me at the moment. I think you'll soon see me in a shoot, with feather head dresses on and a lot of sequence and flowy material. aka my dream.

Late night, no sleep again.

Didn't get to bed until about 7 am yesterday. So, today will probably be the same. I'm going to the doctor for a checkup next week. I'm going to tell him about my insomnia. I think it's just how I go out and all the weird times I get to sleep. I really have no for sure pattern.

Okay, so I'm sipping on some Montevina wine. Red wine is so delicious, and relaxing. I also am making a proposition to stop smoking by the end of this year. We shall see how that goes. Honestly, I'm getting tired of smoking as much as I do. Like cigarettes only taste good when I'm drinking or REALLY stressed. Thats why they work out so good, when I'm out and about.

I'm having this new obsession with just getting my makeup and sitting in front of the mirror and drawing random things on my face. Artistically of course. I went to the mall with a giant purple dollar sign on my face. It was interesting. Tomorrow, I'm thinking maybe a star and or a singular big heart.

Tonights,

This insomnia is ridiculous.

Btw, i have a new obsession. I will not say what/who it is yet.

Actually, its not that new its been going on for a while. I CANT GET IT/HIM/HER out of my head.

I got boba today and realized i want it everyday, minus how fattening it is.

I need a new ipod, and i want to get my nails done.

I'm just saying random things. I wish i could just.....ugh. I cant get TOO personal on here. I need to find somewhere to vent. Somewhere i could actually get things out too, and not have to worry about having everyone else hearing it.

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. i want to watch gossip girl all day tomorrow and just zone out. maybe write more lyrics and talk to someone different. We shall see. bye.

So, this past weekend has been pretty eventful. I went to Washington on Friday to visit family. I was there until Monday afternoon. Honestly, I thought it would be the most horrible weekend ever. It was pretty bad, sure. It could of been a lot worse though.

We went to this waterfall thing and went hiking. My lungs had enough when we got all the way up there. It took me forever to get back down.

It was really a god time to just embrace nature? I guess. I don't know, all the trees and cold weather wasn't my thing. I liked the clean air, but also realized how much I missed the smog here in Los Angeles.

Anyways, got to see my cousins and what not. Everyones growing up, and I'm not as close to them as I would like to be. We all get older though.
The plane ride was nice on the way there, and on the way back. The plane was so small though. It was worse than a bus, but at least we got free drinks. I read the new issue of Vogue and Details for the two hour flight. Vogues article on Gwennyth Paltrow was cute. I liked how it got so personal with her. I don't really follow that actress but, I felt like I did while reading that article. Made me want to go home and watch one of her films. NOT IRON MAN though, that movie bored me so much.
The issue of Details made me feel so much more gayer than I already am. I mean honestly, no straight man would purchase, read and actually follow that magazine. The article on Ashton Kutcher bored me, but I HATE him so it figures.
They had some good grooming advice, but they also had what to wear for summer and I will never wear those KHAKIS. BLEGH!

I took an adventure out there by myself, and went to see a movie. The city life out there is so dull. I liked how artsy it all was though. Honestly, I'm way too out there for everyone to handle out there though.

HMMM! Fiest and Iced tea at 2:30 in the am. The insomnia really does creep up on me.

So, this Tuesday wasn't as good as the past 3 or so. I got to see someone special.
HMMMMM then
I played video games with the little brother, and was all blissful. Then came dinner, drama at the table. Some amazing little Italian restaurant, shitty mood when we left. Family dinners are either just cute, or just horrible. Honestly, it ending in tears sucked. Tomorrow, I have no plans. I'm thinking of just making it a me day and just drawing and what not. We'll see, most likely its going to go by so slow. I'm anticipating Thursday. You'll find out why later.